“Do you ever suffer from the green eyed monster – envy of the mum who seems to have it all, of the mum who is doing it much better than you, of the mum of sleeping children, of the mum with all the free time, of the mum with great job/house/relationship/hair…?”
I bet you do or did. I have to admit that I am definitely part of this. Even from the moment I decided on getting pregnant. The society shows us the perfect mother. The one who looks amazing while pregnant, working until her due date, fashionable, sexy, amazing wife/partner, having the heavenly birth experience and embracing motherhood with all her heart, with a perfect figure right after delivery, having it all figured out from day one and of course with a newborn who sleeps through the night from day one. This Supermum Myth is having a major impact on every one of us out there and it’s definitely not healthy. Causes anxiety, frustrations, develops jealousy and depression and makes us think we are not good enough in anything we do.
Our lives take a turn for the bad only because we surround ourselves with all negative aspects out there
We start thinking “my tummy can show, look at that celebrity how she looks only days after giving birth” “I haven’t slept in ages. Susan’s little one sleeps all night from the day he was born. I must be doing something wrong as a mother” “I am not good enough. My baby only takes the bottle instead of my breast” and the list goes on and on to eternity.
The Supermum Myth is out there and we learn to believe in it, we learn to believe we have to be perfect, strong, have an immaculate home, be chefs and not cooks, have an amazing baby, a raising career and excel in everything.
Let me tell you something. This is all wrong. We are women, mothers, normal people with good days and bad days. We are all perfect in our imperfections and we have to embrace our lives, enjoy it as they are and let go of all envy, jealousy and negative feelings.
The Supermum Myth turned into a book meant to teach you how to overcome anxiety, ditch the guilt and embrace your imperfect self. The authors, one a psychologist and the other a writer, Pilates teacher and specialist in pregnancy and postnatal classes decided on birthing this book to help all struggling mums out there. It contains a list of exercises for any type of women and is filled with advice regarding all feelings that come once with pregnancy and motherhood treating each and every one of them in separate chapters. So you might not suffer with anxiety but struggle with the “I’m not good enough syndrome”; you may not find yourself in the guilt chapter but embrace the envy one. The Supermum Myth treats you regardless.
Reading it I discovered myself in so many situations and I realised where I was going wrong, I’ve seen myself on the supermum side but on the complete failure as well;
I found myself in that moment when frustration takes over and I have to start breathing exercises so I won’t scream at my child but I seen the perfect picture of me teaching my little one nursery rhymes and walking in the park with her smiling proudly that I nailed it for today. See, I am the one with the perfect pictures on instagram but I am the #mumfailure you find on twitter as well. I am both and I thank “The Supermum Myth” for showing them both to me.
Grab it from Amazon, put your feet on the coffee table, grab yourself a glass of wine and relax while learning to embrace your perfect imperfections. Watch your little one sleep and say to yourself: “I done a good job”
“It takes courage to be imperfect”
Be you as a parent, trust your instincts and stop comparing yourself to anyone else.” “Getting the hang of motherhood is less about controlling everything and more about realising what makes you happiest as a mother, and feeling confident enough to trust your instincts.