Have you ever seen a headless chicken? If not just look for it on the internet. I am sure you will get an idea about it. It is a pretty funny picture (if you don’t think too much about the headless part). It is so popular that it got to be an expression related to “a panic-stricken person who is behaving illogically”.
That is me most of the day but my behavior reaches it’s peak every time my baby falls asleep. When she wakes up I feed her and while I do it, my head goes million places planning to turn my house upside down, do laundry have quality time with the monkey, feed myself, wash, do my hair, take little one for a walk, make sure she is a happy munchkin, water my plants (sometimes I feel like they know me and love me so this should be the reason they are still alive), remember to drink the coffee I made and undoubtedly forgot about the minute I poured it in my grumpy mug and when my fiancee comes home try and look like a fresh daisy full of life and in the mood for anything. Oh well, we all know reality hits you hard in the head and after few hours of being awake you only dream of going back to bed. I check the time and realise there is a long way to getting there. My time is measured in feeds now and not minutes or hours. I know Ruby has her milk every three to four hours so I always think what can I do in between those feeds. I know she has a tiny nap around ten in the morning and that is when I go cray cray doing dishes, hoovering, cleaning bathroom, trying to eat and have a sip of coffee. All these in case she is asleep for more than 15 minutes. Not always happening though. Instead of resting, reading a book or an interesting article I run a million miles and hour around the house getting myself exhausted. When baby wakes up I look at her and think “why don’t you sleep for another half hour so mummy can relax a bit?” But she just smiles at me thinking I am good to go. So we start chatting, playing in the bouncer, make sure we get enough tummy time, have a laugh and feed again. Thanks to her I learned to tidy up in no time and get ready to go out way in advance (sometimes three hours before). I need to be ready so when we have to get out the house I only have to get her ready and not forget about toys, set of clothes just in case we have an accident, milk, wipes, nappies, bags to put the used nappies on and than whatever I need to leave the house: wallet, phone, keys (I always panic thinking I left without keys and I can’t get back in the house).
Ruby’s next nap takes place anytime between one pm and four pm (only lately it got somehow to five pm and there she goes over tired and not sleeping properly at night – but that’s my luck, isn’t it?). So it is a bit irrelevant as I am trying to keep her outside for this time of the day. This is the time when I can socialize, do shopping, send emails, catch up with a friend over the phone and have my long walk hoping it will help me lose the belly I have left in no time. (I need a miracle here)
You are going to think when do I write. Another activity I need a bit of time for. Normally I write in the evenings after night night time. Sometimes I do it while she is in the bouncer (I supervise her while I write my post in my notes on the phone) and sometimes when I am lucky just when inspiration hits me (that involves Kris being home).
So yes, I am trying to have a happy child, clean house, perfect relationship and lovely life. Sometimes I fail miserably and I am a bitch, sometimes I exceed all expectations and I am over the moon. I never know where the day takes me but I know I definitely try my best.
While I am writing now I look at her smiling at me as she just woke up. She giggles like trying to tell me I should finish and give her kisses and my full attention. She does deserve it and she is more important than the cleanliness of my house, the writing I do or anything else that can go through your minds.
Who cares if I dusted around, cleaned the windows or washed my dishes? When it comes to the happiness of my baby none of that matters.
PS: Don’t forget to water the plants. They don’t live on love but water
SONG OF THE DAY: – such an amazing song