When I say babies know I mean it. They have this power over your brain and feelings it is absolutely overwhelming and sometimes so annoying

The connection between a mother and her baby is unbelievably real, beautiful and so strong. Apparently babies feel their mums mood and take all of it on themselves up to the age of six. If so I am literally screwed. As much as I love what me and my daughter have, this just messes up all my plans. In the past eight months I only went out on my own once and another time with Kris to see Jim Jefferies. That is twice in eight months. You want to know why? Not because I did not want to, not because I have no friends to go out with but only because Ruby had to do something last minute and fuck up our plans. Either she got a cold, had fever (this only happened once as she didn’t get it when she had the vaccines), refused to sleep or had an intense crying session that ended up in me getting frustrated and staying in either I had an anxiety moment that turned her into a grumpy little baby who could only be settled by being held by me.

Few days ago I had a friend coming over. I was happy about it and couldn’t wait to have aΒ  girls night in chatting and catching up over a bottle of wine

I decided on making some pancakes quickly so we can have some food as well. Everything was proper planned so I stayed calm all day. This until Ruby decided on falling asleep two hours later than usual (she went to sleep at nine pm). She tossed and turned in her bed like there was no tomorrow. She demanded to hold my hand while moaning God knows what. Then she rejected my hand but she wanted to have her back rubbed while she tried to get comfortable lying down on her tummy. And she got bored of this as well. Got back on her back, on one side, on the other side, laughed, cried, played with the dummies, shared one with the bunny and the list can go on forever. Just two minutes before Lili arrived there is my little munchkin finally asleep and me absolutely exhausted praying for energy to make the promised pancakes. Don’t need to mention she slept through the night and I am grateful for it but those two hours were a nightmare.
Last night I only wanted peace and quiet, get into the New Year sipping a glass of champagne and declaring my love, watching the fireworks on TV and enjoying Robbie Williams performing at the Royal Albert Hall. Everything was prepared nicely and the house clean (thank God for that). I had a bit of food and I was so relaxed not thinking of going back to work or any other stressing situation.

It was all pink clouds


my baby can’t fall asleep in bed so this seems unlikely although I would find it hilariousΒ 

At least until about ten pm when my baby decided to wake up all of a sudden. And she started chatting away with me, her toys, the lamp and any other object she noticed in the bedroom. She then started moaning to pick her up. Although I refused at the beginning, I had to give up and do what she wanted me to do. I had no energy for this and all I wanted was for her to go back to bed. Only she had different plans. Like I said, babies KNOW. So did mine. She knew I wanted her to sleep so she did everything but just to spite me. And if there was a moment when I got annoyed she made sure she made me laugh the next second.

So here I am rocking her and moving from my bed to walking around the room and trying to get her in her own bed and there she was blowing raspberries and smiling at me like it was ten in the morning and not the evening of New Years Eve

But why would she care? For her was a day like no other. Or no. Actually not. It was the day she felt I have different plans so she decided to mess them up. I mean why not?! She can do whatever she wants with me and her dad.
So there came midnight and I had to take her with me in the living room. God she was so excited about the fireworks on TV. So she laughed and laughed until father sleep came around and closed her eyes. Time for me to have a glass of champagne and say Happy New Year with about thirty minutes delay, think of my resolutions and go to bed.
These are not the only times she played with me like this and she is not the only baby who does this. Spoke with my friends and they confirmed to me: babies know when you talk about them, when you want them to do something and specially when you wish so much for them to sleep and they will do the complete opposite just because they can.
Do I plan on watching a movie? Bad. Very bad. She will definitely not sleep or wake up. Do I want to write? Lots of luck. Every time I start a post I try to do it when she sleeps and somehow I end up typing in my notes while I rock her or while I watch her bouncing up and down in her bouncer. Do I want to wash my hair? Cancel it. I can do it tomorrow. She will moan and want to hold my hand for ages.
At the moment Ruby is at the stage when she is learning that actions have consequences but unfortunately for me she finds it hilarious. If I say NO she smiles and does it again so here I am explaining and distracting her from what she is not allowed. Good luck to me.
As I said my friends told me that their babies are just the same. They know.

I bet a big number of babies were awake last night although they sleep perfectly fine on any other random night

I bet they feel perfectly fine until you decide on leaving the house and somehow something happens so they can make you cancel. And I also bet you never mind. You always rather cuddle your tiny humans instead of taking a hundred years to find something to wear (lucky if it looks good on you), make the effort of wearing make up, traveling to central so you can have a drink or two being stressed of not getting drunk cause you know the price you have to pay for it. You know you will only get few hours sleep and you have to be all fresh for your baby cause he/she doesn’t care what you did last night. Or actually they will decide on having one of those grumpy times so they can make your day even more miserable and trust me, no amount of coffee will help here. And good luck with toys, songs, games and funny faces while you feel like shit.

Babies know and feel everything so they will take a piss and wish you a lovely day


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