Being a mum implies lots and lots of embarrassing moments when you prefer the ground opening and swallowing you instead of having to live some of these incidents. And it begins from when you become a mum and not later on.

I just assume that with the toddler phase it goes from bad to worse.

I tried to avoid moments like these  but sometimes the inevitable is just around the corner and you can’t prevent it.
I have been trying to get my daughter into swimming lessons since before she could hold her head straight. The baby has to be three months plus so they can be considered apt for a swimming pool. Mine was only two when I started looking and I remember it was so so hot outside and cold weather seemed so far away. Everywhere I looked and it was affordable there were never empty spaces available. It was all fully booked and my desperation grew by the day. I wanted this so much for her. But apparently for me if I want something bad enough I won’t get it. Time passed and the only place I could take her was at Water Babies where you only need to pay around £175 for few half hour sessions. I never been and probably the facilities are amazing but I wasn’t able to pay this much money. Couple of weeks back one of the mummies I got friends with and actually keep in touch, found the swimming pool in Acton where they have baby classes as well. We decided to check it out as it is walking distance from Ealing and the price was pretty good (as in £25 a month). Sounded too good to be true but sometimes things are like this. After talking to a guy in reception explaining to us the available days and prices and facilities, we decided to go for it. Mondays at 12:00 works for both of us. We get to hang out and babies have some quality time. I gave up on baby club so I had to do something with Ruby and try keeping myself sane in the same time.

First lesson that was last week was absolutely amazing. The swimming teacher is brilliant with little ones and gave me confidence with regards to jumping up and down with my monkey in the water. Turns out she is a little mermaid. She loves the water and she was so relaxed (unlike her mother who has no idea how to swim anyways and believes she was drowned in a past life – that is how scared I am when it comes to being in the water). The guy took Ruby by the arms and swam with her while I watched my baby throwing her little legs like a pro and laughing like never before.

Those thirty minutes were pure bliss and the two hour nap that Ruby took after made me so proud of my choice.

I couldn’t wait for the next Monday to come back and start all over again. The entire time the babies get to hear nursery rhymes and play with soft toys in the water as well. This makes it so interactive and fun. (If you are interested and in the area try checking out Everyone Active in Acton. If you are lucky to get Adam as your instructor than you are in for a treat).
Looking for a house filled my time and got me exhausted but before I knew it it was Monday again and here I go at the pool with little mermaid. We got there and she was greeted with songs and smiles from everyone as she is the youngest of them all. I was so ready for the lesson. We got in the water and I felt Ruby kicking her legs like ready for attack. We started singing and swinging, going round and round the pool. It was so relaxing. After such a crazy week I was finally breathing and enjoying something. You know when things are too good to be true?
Well, try this moment. Karma is a bitch and payed me back for being so happy.
Twenty minutes into the session and I lift Ruby up scared she swallowed a bit of water. She didn’t but instead I got to see the top of my bathing suit full of poop. And it was spreading in the pool. So so fast you wouldn’t believe it. I had to alert everyone so we got out the water. I was red faced, embarrassed like I never been in my life and apologising to everyone while my daughter was laughing in my arms socialising with everyone who was passing by. So here I was covered in poop, with eyes full of chlorine and a smiley baby taking a piss out of what was happening.

Lesson done for the day. Swimming pool closed.

I did not know how to run quicker cursing those shitty “little swimmers” nappies leaking in the worst of times. How the hell am I supposed to look forward to going back now? My favourite place turned into a mine field for me who I think everyone hates me cause little mermaid turned out to be little miss shitty pants. I want to laugh right now thinking of that moment but I still can’t do it. What I am sure of is the fact that i will definitely save this memory for when Ruby will grow up. And I am going to tell her what she did so I can make her feel embarrassed like she made me. Little sucker needs to pay for it cause mummy can’t fully enjoy the swimming pool now. Never ever. All I’ll do is study her face and movements, be vigilant and look for the poop not to come out into the water again.
Looking forward for Monday now. Or not.


SONG OF THE DAY: – little mermaid. What else?


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  2. Thanks for this. I am not an expert in traffic. To be honest I don’t want thousands of people on traffic. I prefer knowing that by what I do I can help a mummy or two. That makes me happier


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