Hello September with all your beauty ,❤️

As soon as August left I woke up to a different everything. The air felt cooler, the road was filled with fallen leaves and we even managed to find a few conkers – the first of the year.

Kids are back to school and I said HELLO to routine and WFH without being asked a question a second and being pushed to “look here mummy” so I can see something cool (aka a jump from a chair, a piece of paper folded in twenty or a pencil we completely forgot about and randomly found after a year).

Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love every second of it, every question and every argument but it can be draining at times. Every moment when I feel like I will start shouting or tell her off I remember that we are making memories right now. I will miss this when she grows up and I’ll pray for a stolen hug and a kiss without being told I embarrass her. Although I would love for all this to be just a thought, I know teenage years are upon us and they come with huge challenges They are around the corner, knocking on our door.

I can see the first signs and I am absolutely terrified. The mood swings, the emotional mess, uncontrollable feelings and outbursts, the eye roll and the insane desire for independence. I really don’t know how to cope, how to react or behave. I don’t want to be too strict but I don’t want to be too weak. I want her to know that I am here, I am her friend and not only her mum, I am always going to support her no matter what. I would love to make her understand that although change is scary and it comes with a whole new set of challenges, it can also be beautiful, productive, fun and interesting.

She became obsessed with Inside Out 2 and I have to admit that it is so helpful. In those short moments when she still sees a friend in me, she is talking about her new found emotions: anger, envy, anxiety and embarrassment. It’s hard to think your child is experiencing such intense feelings but also, it’s so satisfying to see how she acknowledges and fully tries to embrace them.

She is smart and kind but also stubborn like a mule and I can’t stop but wonder: what kind of teenager will she be? What sort of a young woman will she become? I wish I could protect her every step of the way but unfortunately I can’t. I need to offer her the opportunity to learn from her mistakes, to learn how to react and take decisions on her own. I need her to be also brave, take risks and be bold. Push her boundaries and know who she really is.

The future is scary. Changes are always scary. But if we don’t take the plunge, how would we grow? How would we be able to become better?

Change can be terrifying but it can lead to amazing adventures, incredible memories and experiences that will shape us and help model the person we dream to become.

So, here we are. Another fall 🍂 another school year and a bucket full of anxiety later, facing the unknown. My daughter said to me that her biggest challenge this year would be to improve 100% in every aspect – become better at maths, English, gymnastics, running, science and any other subject you might think of because we haven’t received the curriculum yet.

And you know what? … I am scared as well. I am scared of the changes taking place. I am scared of not being the best mum she could ever want and need. I am scared of becoming that annoying pushy parent who forgets to allow their child the joy of childhood. I am scared of not arranging tuition for secondary school yet but I am also scared that if I do, I’ll push her into a direction she might not want.

But then, I remember just how beautiful September is, how glorious autumn can be and how seasons change. September and the fall season can be a reminder that change is beautiful. It reminds us to cultivate gratitude and treasure the ever-changing beauty that it holds, appreciating the transitions of life.