This was supposed to be my yesterday’s post but life got in the way and I kept postponing until it was so late that the only thing I wanted to do was sleep.

Sorry for the delay. Today I will have to do two posts. Day 19 was to discuss my first love. I thought hard on this subject and contemplated on what or who to write about. I think everyone’s first love is not love but infatuation. It’s those butterflies you feel for the first time as a teenager and you just jump head first into this whirlwind of teenage drama, tears and listening to love songs that you feel were written for you and you only. Usually, when this happens, you “fall” for the boy who is already “in love” with another girl, most times, a girl you know or is your actual best friend.

I remember those times and I remember them well. I think my first crush happened when I met a boy in my first year of high school at the freshman party. He was from anther school and came with someone from our school. We danced and I remember he kissed me while taking me home as he was a gentleman like that. We didn’t have mobile phones back then, nor pagers. Only landline and we didn’t exchange numbers. We lived close to each other in the same neighborhood but I can’t say when we met after that evening nor how it all started.

I think we just clicked and our “love” was just this on and off tormented young love that never actually happened officially in the sense of actual boyfriend and girlfriend. We were seeing each other whenever we could and I think in time it just became this strong, unbreakable bond and friendship that went beyond the teenage crush. He was there for me when I needed him and I like to think I was always there for him in need. We have been through lots together and we still say Happy Birthday to each other and Merry Christmas and we like to know that we are there.

I have not seen him since I left the country back in 2011 and I don’t think we will meet again but it’s nice to know what each is doing and it’s beautiful to remember those times, the years that went by and how it changed us.

There is not much to say honestly. I like to keep the memories for myself. They are part of who I am and also that particular relationship gave me so many lessons in life: who I am, what I want, what I don’t want; how not to take crap and how love is not always out there to show to the world but to be lived just for yourself.